Seek mentors, then mentor.
Hey — I'm one of the people who wants to see you grow, and I want to tell you a small secret: everyone needs a guide sometimes, and everyone can be a guide too. When something feels hard — a new class, a big game, a fight with a friend, or feeling confused about who you are — finding someone who has walked a similar path can make a huge difference. A mentor is someone who listens, shares what they’ve learned, and shows up when things get messy. You don’t need someone perfect; you need someone kind, patient, and honest. Look for teachers, coaches, older students, family friends, librarians, or someone at a club who talks to you with respect. It’s okay to ask, “Can I learn from you?” Most people are flattered and happy to help when they see you trying.
As you get help, remember simple words that can turn a heavy hour into something lighter. Short phrases can be like stepping stones: they let you breathe, try again, and feel seen. Try these with someone who’s mentoring you, or say them to yourself when you’re nervous. They are easy to remember but powerful in how they make you feel and how they help you keep going:
- “I see you trying,” “It’s okay to ask,” “Let’s do one small step,” “I believe in you,” “Tell me what you think,” “You’re not alone,” “Mistakes help you learn,” “What helped you before?”
When you’re ready, pay that kindness forward. Mentoring doesn’t mean you must have all the answers — it means you can share what you know and listen hard when someone else is scared. Start small: show a younger classmate how you solved a math problem, teach a friend a warm-up you use before soccer, or sit with someone who’s lonely at lunch. Be honest: say “I don’t know, but we can find out together,” or “I used to feel that way too.” Those lines build trust. Being a mentor also strengthens you. When you explain something, you understand it better. When you comfort someone, you practice patience and empathy. You’ll learn what worked for you and what didn’t, and that experience becomes a gift to others.
Some days you’ll need a mentor harder than you can help someone else — that’s normal. It’s also okay if the first person you ask can’t be your mentor; try again. Keep a list of people who have helped you and small phrases that calm you, then use them. The circle of seeking help and then giving it creates a kinder, braver place: you get stronger with guidance, and your strength becomes the help someone else needs. Remember, asking for help is brave, and offering help is powerful. Start today — find someone who listens, learn a little, and then help another person take the next step.